No! You have not made any bad choices!

Over the past few weeks I’ve been reviewing my past – my choices and insights, the things that shaped me into the woman I am today.

To be honest, it’s not an easy process.

I like to be positive, look at the progress I’ve made over the years – and I have made astounding progress but, more often than not, it was through sheer bloody-mindedness though I prefer to call it persistence.

But, if I’m to do a genuine review, then I have to be honest with myself – face the qualities that stopped me for far too long – although who knows how long is too long?  After all, I did end up landing where I’m happy to be.

Read moreNo! You have not made any bad choices!

How are you stopping yourself from being happy?

The most dramatic example I can think of how I stopped myself from being happy is my long marriage.

When I finally reached the point when I decided that the pain of staying was worse than the fear of the unknown, you’d have thought all I had to do was – to do it!

Instead, 37 years of habitual behaviours around the routine of living a joint life, conspired to keep me stuck for a long time.

Because I had left so many of the tasks of day-to-day living to Jim, I believed I was incapable of surviving without him.

Read moreHow are you stopping yourself from being happy?

Would you like an easy way to feel great? Here’s how…

There is a phrase people used to use this time of the year along the lines of ‘goodwill to all men’.  I haven’t heard it for a while, have you? Not even paraphrased to ‘…all men and women’ or even ‘… to all humankind’.

Those of you who have been reading my blogs for a while will have noticed that I’m always encouraging you to give random acts of kindness.

I just remembered reading an interview with Mother Theresa where the journalist was shocked at the squalor of her environment and praised her selflessness.  In reply, she exclaimed, “You don’t understand!  I’m happy!”

Read moreWould you like an easy way to feel great? Here’s how…

You’re only one decision away from a totally different life – and here’s how…

At my Meetup earlier this week, we had a new member joining us.  She told us she only found out about my meeting 2 hours ago and decided to come.

So here’s the thing.

She could have decided that 2 hours was too short and that she’d better wait until next month’s Meetup.

Had she decided not to come, nothing would have changed for her.

Read moreYou’re only one decision away from a totally different life – and here’s how…

How to let go of your pain

The experience of pain is a very personal one. What causes one person pain, another can handle with a shrug.

Some of the causes are significant and obvious – an affair, lies, betrayal and more.

And then there’s the kind of cause that is subtle, the kind that makes you go for a very long time wondering why you’re feeling hurt, upset, frustrated or resentful – and the drip-drip-drip effect continues until one day you wake up depleted, empty, with your self-confidence shattered and a strong feeling of unworthiness.

As with physical pain where the body twists itself in unlikely shapes in order to cope with it, we do the same with emotional pain. We try to adapt to minimise the pain so we can pretend it doesn’t really hurt – as I did for so many years.

Read moreHow to let go of your pain

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