If you’ve ever struggled with letting go, here’s why

We don’t know what we don’t know.  This statement may sound rather cryptic but is actually very profound.

It means that, when we’re unaware of something such as a limiting belief, we cannot make changes.  And, what’s worse, those limiting beliefs will drive our choices with disappointing results without us knowing why.

Over the years I’ve shared with you some of my poor choices – choosing my life partner, staying in a loveless marriage for as long as I did, never asking for help because I believed people would regard me as a burden and many more.

You’d think I’d be a lot more self-aware but here’s the thing.

Becoming self-aware is not a once-and-for-all event.  It’s like peeling an onion – there are always more layers to uncover!

Awareness can come in all sorts of ways – in my case, my latest collision between self-perception and reality came via a dear friend of mine.

Read moreIf you’ve ever struggled with letting go, here’s why

If you want to rekindle a relationship, try this

Feeling invisible can be very debilitating. I can’t begin to imagine what it must be like to feel unseen, unheard, even unloved?

shutterstock_176813414This feeling of being invisible often seems to strike once women in particular retire.

I recently started working with Sonia (not her real name). Sonia is 71, her husband is 74 and they’ve been married 41 years.

When we

Read moreIf you want to rekindle a relationship, try this

What stops you from being true to yourself

shutterstock_189619739A favourite refrain of my parents’ when I wanted to do something or other that didn’t meet with their approval was, “What will the neighbours say?”

The idea that I had to make sure I did nothing that might

Read moreWhat stops you from being true to yourself

The beauty of power and how to get more of it

shutterstock_220931875The idea that you can feel powerful doesn’t sit comfortably, especially if you are a woman.

It’s a word most people usually associated with men. So when I suggest to a client that she’s more powerful than she imagines, the reaction is ambivalent.

That changes when I go on to describe my definition of what it means to be powerful:

To have the ability to influence, to make things happen, to make a difference.

Read moreThe beauty of power and how to get more of it

Powerlessness is learned. Here’s how to unlearn it

hOne of the most destructive myths around is the belief that we’re powerless, helpless to change our life, our destiny.

The key word in this sentence is ‘belief’ because beliefs are things you can change. But, before you can change anything, you need to understand how it works:

Here are is a story that highlights the process of becoming helpless:

Read morePowerlessness is learned. Here’s how to unlearn it

The Legacy of Yang-May Ooi – ‘Bound Feet Blues’

Today I’m privileged to share with you the wisdom and the gift of a dear friend of mine, writer and performer, Yang-May Ooi. Aged 52, she’s is taking to the West End stage for the first time her personal story. Yang-May is an award-winning TEDx speaker, bestselling author and acclaimed story performer. Take a look at her website www.StoryGuru.co.uk.

Here she speaks of her background, what brought her to this point in her life and why she’s compelled to share her story.

Read moreThe Legacy of Yang-May Ooi – ‘Bound Feet Blues’

Is worry useful or useless? Here’s how to tell the difference

shutterstock_220750444Here’s something I finally figured out:

Worrying is a habit. A lot of it falls under the heading of ‘what if’. “What if I get made redundant?”, “what if (s/he) has an accident?”, “what if I’m delayed and I miss my flight?”, “what if the hospital tests show I have some dreadful disease?”.  Which

Read moreIs worry useful or useless? Here’s how to tell the difference

Why doing something pleasurable increases your energy levels

hOne of the most important things you can do for other people is to do enjoyable things for yourself, things that uplift you and give you pleasure.

It won’t surprise you to hear that I get a lot of resistance when I suggest this. “I don’t have the time”, “I have too much to do” and the worst excuse of the lot, “it would be selfish”.

And yet,

Read moreWhy doing something pleasurable increases your energy levels

Prepare to be amazed when you change your beliefs from limiting to empowering

h‘Tis nothing good or bad but thinking makes it so’, William Shakespeare

We will most likely be familiar with this quote but it needs expanding: It’s not enough to think it; you also need to believe that ‘it’ – whatever ‘it’ may be – is true. That’s what, over time, leads to self-fulfilling prophecies.

Even though

Read morePrepare to be amazed when you change your beliefs from limiting to empowering

Did you know you can re-invent your past?

shutterstock_176813414I bet you – and probably everybody else on the planet from age of roughly 7 onwards – have baggage. For many of us, including me, that includes separation or divorce. Some of us will have gone through hell and high water, and the pain, the bitterness and the

Read moreDid you know you can re-invent your past?

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