What to do about setbacks when they happen

Life’s a challenge. Stuff happens. Obstacles, disappointments, setbacks. Yes, been there, done that – as have you.

Most of us hope that, once this particular problem’s been sorted life will be smooth again – if it ever was.

The thing is, whether you like it or not, there will always be challenges big and small because, let’s face it, that’s life.

So, what do you do about that?  

Far too many of us complain, feel resentful and sorry for ourselves – “It’s not fair! Why me!?”, we rage.

Actually, I think that’s the wrong question. The real question is “Why not me?”
But there’s another point which is much more important. Here’s where Nichiren Buddhism comes in which is what I practise.

Obstacles and setbacks are to be welcome, it suggests.

Sounds a bit strange, I know, but the thinking behind it is that there are huge benefits behind setbacks and obstacles.

For one, they make you stronger. You learn a lot about yourself. You’re forced to dig into your resources and discover, perhaps to your surprise, that there’s more to you than you suspected.

This is how you strengthen your resilience.

An easy life without knocks weakens you so that, when adversity strikes, as it invariably does, you won’t have the inner resources you need to deal with it in a creative and productive way.

And that’s not all.

There’s the added benefit of how you feel about yourself once you’ve overcome a particular obstacle – the harder it was to surmount, the more inner resources you had to dig into that you didn’t even know you had, like persistence, determination, courage, resourcefulness – the better you feel about yourself.

Isn’t that a price worth paying?

With love and gratitude


P.S. My new book, Open Your Heart: The 7 Secrets of Strong and Loving Relationships will be published on Tuesday 25 July.

P.P.S. I enable women build strong and loving relationships, first with themselves and then with others. That’s because your relationship with yourself shapes all your other relationships.
If you’d like to find out how you can do that, call me on 020 8940 7056 or email me on sue@sueplumtree.com for a FREE one hour exploratory conversation.








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